Hope in the Dark: When Grief Meets Faith
There’s a topic we don’t talk about enough in church.
It’s not neat. It’s not always easy to wrap in a bow.
But it’s real. And it affects nearly all of us.
It’s grief.
So today, we’re leaning into it—not to dwell in the pain, but to discover God’s presence in the middle of it.
What Is Grief, Really?
Grief isn’t just crying at a funeral.
Grief is the deep ache of disappointment.
It shows up not just after a death, but:
After a divorce.
After a breakup.
After a betrayal.
After the dream fell apart.
After the job loss.
After the prayer that didn’t get answered the way you hoped.
And grief doesn’t always look like tears.
Sometimes it looks like silence.
Or fatigue.
Or pretending you’re okay when you’re not.
Grief is real. And it’s heavy.
The Suitcase of Grief ?
Let me give you a picture.
I showed our church a bag my mom uses when she travels to Nigeria. It’s big. Heavy. Filled with stuff she’s collected for months—sometimes years.
Now imagine carrying that bag everywhere.
To work. On dates. Into the bedroom.
It drags. It slows you down. It’s exhausting.
That’s what grief can be like on your soul.
It’s an invisible suitcase you carry through life.
You don’t always open it, but you never forget it’s there.
Sometimes, it even pops open in public—when you least expect it. And out comes the pain, the anger, the bitterness.
Maybe you know that suitcase well.
My Story: A Grief That Nearly Took Me Out
One of the most painful moments of my life came when I lost someone who wasn’t dead—but still felt gone.
He was my pastor. My spiritual father. A giant of the faith. A mentor. A leader. I was a part of building his church from the ground up. And one day, he fell.
Moral failure. Adultery. Divorce. He walked away from it all—even when forgiveness was offered. I wept in the church parking lot like a baby. It felt like I had lost everything. I had to wrestle with bitterness, disappointment, and the overwhelming weight of grief.
And I had to learn this:
If I didn’t surrender my grief to God, it would swallow me.
So Where Is God When Life Breaks Your Heart?
Psalm 34:18 says, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”
Let that sink in. Your pain doesn’t push God away— It pulls Him closer.
God doesn’t expect you to be strong when you’re grieving. He invites you to come near.
So how do we walk through grief with faith?
1. Name the Disappointment
We often want to ignore pain. We tell ourselves:
“I don’t want to talk about it. I just want it to go away.”
But healing starts by naming it.
You can’t surrender something you haven’t identified.
You’re allowed to say, “It’s not supposed to be this way.”
1 Peter 5:7 (AMP) tells us:
“Cast all your cares—all your anxieties, all your worries, all your concerns—on Him, for He cares about you.”
God can’t heal what you hide.
But when you bring your pain into the light, it loses its power to control you.
Author Lysa TerKeurst shared how grief hit hardest during family holidays. The empty chair at the table reminded her of what was lost. But instead of avoiding it, she invited Jesus to sit in that space. “Jesus, I feel this emptiness... but I believe You can fill it.”
That’s where healing begins. When you invite Jesus in.
2. God Doesn’t Always Fix It—But He Always Redeems
We often pray for God to fix what’s broken. But what if He wants to redeem it instead?
Redemption is deeper than rescue.
Rescue solves the surface problem.
Redemption transforms the heart underneath it.
What I mean is... God isn’t just after restoration—He’s after transformation.
John 16:33 says:
“In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
Like the Japanese art of Kintsugi, where broken pottery is repaired with gold, God doesn’t hide your cracks. He highlights them with His grace. He doesn’t take you back to what you were—He creates something better.
3. Shift from “Why?” to “What Now, Lord?”
“Why did this happen?” is a fair question.
But staying in why can keep you stuck.
Ask instead: “Lord, what do You want me to see or do now?”
Lamentations 3:21-23 says:
“Yet I still dare to hope… The faithful love of the Lord never ends… His mercies begin afresh each morning.”
Remember this... Disappointment is a doorway to fresh direction.
You may not have chosen to walk through that door way… but God is waiting for you there with fresh direction.
4. Its not the End of the Story
Here’s why it hurts so much:
You weren’t made for grief. You were created for eternity.
That’s why Jesus came. Not just to heal—but to restore.
Revelation 21:4 reminds us:
“He will wipe every tear from their eyes…”
So one day, the pain will end. One day, the mess will make sense.
But until then, trust the Carpenter.
Ever seen a carpenter’s shop?
It’s full of dust. But dust is proof that something new is being created.
God made man from dust. Jesus healed with mud.
And He’s still making masterpieces out of messes.
In Closing: God Is Still Good
If you’re walking through grief or disappointment right now, let me remind you:
God is good.
God is good to you.
God is good at being good.
God is good at being God.
You may feel broken. But God is not finished.
It’s not neat. It’s not always easy to wrap in a bow.
But it’s real. And it affects nearly all of us.
It’s grief.
So today, we’re leaning into it—not to dwell in the pain, but to discover God’s presence in the middle of it.
What Is Grief, Really?
Grief isn’t just crying at a funeral.
Grief is the deep ache of disappointment.
It shows up not just after a death, but:
After a divorce.
After a breakup.
After a betrayal.
After the dream fell apart.
After the job loss.
After the prayer that didn’t get answered the way you hoped.
And grief doesn’t always look like tears.
Sometimes it looks like silence.
Or fatigue.
Or pretending you’re okay when you’re not.
Grief is real. And it’s heavy.
The Suitcase of Grief ?
Let me give you a picture.
I showed our church a bag my mom uses when she travels to Nigeria. It’s big. Heavy. Filled with stuff she’s collected for months—sometimes years.
Now imagine carrying that bag everywhere.
To work. On dates. Into the bedroom.
It drags. It slows you down. It’s exhausting.
That’s what grief can be like on your soul.
It’s an invisible suitcase you carry through life.
You don’t always open it, but you never forget it’s there.
Sometimes, it even pops open in public—when you least expect it. And out comes the pain, the anger, the bitterness.
Maybe you know that suitcase well.
My Story: A Grief That Nearly Took Me Out
One of the most painful moments of my life came when I lost someone who wasn’t dead—but still felt gone.
He was my pastor. My spiritual father. A giant of the faith. A mentor. A leader. I was a part of building his church from the ground up. And one day, he fell.
Moral failure. Adultery. Divorce. He walked away from it all—even when forgiveness was offered. I wept in the church parking lot like a baby. It felt like I had lost everything. I had to wrestle with bitterness, disappointment, and the overwhelming weight of grief.
And I had to learn this:
If I didn’t surrender my grief to God, it would swallow me.
So Where Is God When Life Breaks Your Heart?
Psalm 34:18 says, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”
Let that sink in. Your pain doesn’t push God away— It pulls Him closer.
God doesn’t expect you to be strong when you’re grieving. He invites you to come near.
So how do we walk through grief with faith?
1. Name the Disappointment
We often want to ignore pain. We tell ourselves:
“I don’t want to talk about it. I just want it to go away.”
But healing starts by naming it.
You can’t surrender something you haven’t identified.
You’re allowed to say, “It’s not supposed to be this way.”
1 Peter 5:7 (AMP) tells us:
“Cast all your cares—all your anxieties, all your worries, all your concerns—on Him, for He cares about you.”
God can’t heal what you hide.
But when you bring your pain into the light, it loses its power to control you.
Author Lysa TerKeurst shared how grief hit hardest during family holidays. The empty chair at the table reminded her of what was lost. But instead of avoiding it, she invited Jesus to sit in that space. “Jesus, I feel this emptiness... but I believe You can fill it.”
That’s where healing begins. When you invite Jesus in.
2. God Doesn’t Always Fix It—But He Always Redeems
We often pray for God to fix what’s broken. But what if He wants to redeem it instead?
Redemption is deeper than rescue.
Rescue solves the surface problem.
Redemption transforms the heart underneath it.
What I mean is... God isn’t just after restoration—He’s after transformation.
John 16:33 says:
“In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”
Like the Japanese art of Kintsugi, where broken pottery is repaired with gold, God doesn’t hide your cracks. He highlights them with His grace. He doesn’t take you back to what you were—He creates something better.
3. Shift from “Why?” to “What Now, Lord?”
“Why did this happen?” is a fair question.
But staying in why can keep you stuck.
Ask instead: “Lord, what do You want me to see or do now?”
Lamentations 3:21-23 says:
“Yet I still dare to hope… The faithful love of the Lord never ends… His mercies begin afresh each morning.”
Remember this... Disappointment is a doorway to fresh direction.
You may not have chosen to walk through that door way… but God is waiting for you there with fresh direction.
4. Its not the End of the Story
Here’s why it hurts so much:
You weren’t made for grief. You were created for eternity.
That’s why Jesus came. Not just to heal—but to restore.
Revelation 21:4 reminds us:
“He will wipe every tear from their eyes…”
So one day, the pain will end. One day, the mess will make sense.
But until then, trust the Carpenter.
Ever seen a carpenter’s shop?
It’s full of dust. But dust is proof that something new is being created.
God made man from dust. Jesus healed with mud.
And He’s still making masterpieces out of messes.
In Closing: God Is Still Good
If you’re walking through grief or disappointment right now, let me remind you:
God is good.
God is good to you.
God is good at being good.
God is good at being God.
You may feel broken. But God is not finished.
Posted in Sermon Blog